Anti-fur protestors dump bucket of paint onto fox

TORONTO (The News Desk) — At a gathering in Morningside Park today, a group of incensed anti-fur protestors dumped a bucket of red acrylic paint onto a fox as it emerged from its den just after sunrise.

After hurling obscenities at the fleeing creature for approximately 10 minutes, and flinging red paint at its kits, the protestors finally dispersed, agreeing to meet at a Burger King to plan their next demonstration.

“We abhor cruelty in all its forms,” said Kendall Price, president of not-for-profit organization Ontario Against Fur, before being called away to heft a large placard that read, “YOUR CHILDREN WILL GO TO HELL, MURDERER.”

The group had trekked through rough terrain to the den, fording a small creek and scaling a dangerously sharp incline at some distance from the nearest hiking trail.

“It wasn’t easy, getting all the paint and protest signs up here,” said the leader of the determined group. “But nothing about ending cruelty like this is ever easy.”

The fox, having fled from the torrent of paint and violent language, was unavailable for comment at press time, but eyewitnesses confirmed that its $20,000 Fendi mink coat was completely ruined. ♦

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